Today, I took brief break from the May-mayhem to get caught up on the state of the world. Man, I should have just stayed ignorant because there's nothing good popping in the news.
North Korea is tripping.
The days of being pregnant and eating a triple fudge sundae with brownie sprinkles and having everyone think it's cute are over.
The economy is still stagnant.
And of course, there's this mess. Now really Mamas, I'm not one to be judgmental. I'm as laid-back and open-minded as they come... but DAMN!!!!
Twenty-nine years old.
Eleven different mothers.
Child support for each child = approximately $1.98 per kid.
What the hell can you buy for $1.98? Besides gum.
"Mommy I'm hungry."
"Don't worry baby. Daddy'll be here soon with your big pack of Juicy Fruit. You just chew real slow."
Talk to me about responsibility. What the hell is on this dude's mind? What's more... the mothers. They're killing me. I don't even know where to begin, aside from lining up all eleven in a row and running down the line with an open-handed smack. I hope those 21 kids are some super-resilient, ultra-determined little rugrats, or that they at least have other relatives with some sense to pick up the slack, otherwise, do any of those children even stand a chance?
Trojans anyone? Ortho patch? Nuva Ring? Depo-damn-Provera??! Hell, withdrawl method??!!! Something! Anything!!!