What the boys think...

There's been plenty of talk about how our sex-rich society effects the well-being of little girls, and with good reason. Early sexualization has far reaching effects that impact not only the healthy development of girls, but also how boys view girls and women.

I came across an enlightening (yet disturbing) bit of information a few years back from researcher Judith Jordan. She outlines two developmental paths in adolescence: "the emergence in boys of “sexual entitlement” and in girls of “sexual accommodation...” -- (Girlsinc.org)

So while media messages convey that being hot, sexually aggressive, and dressing to show what you've got is empowering for girls, the fact is… guys don’t feel that way. In their minds, if a girl is looking and acting sexy, it's because she wants to please them.

A great example of this type of male-thinking is this excellent piece done by the Canadian Broadcasting Channel. Here's the gist:

At an after-school drop-in arcade, we catch up with some volunteers who are trying to give young boys guidance. They see that a leading source of information about sex is now the media, and they’re worried about the message boys are getting about girls.

“Women are glorified as sexual objects in front of these boys,” says Nima, one of the volunteers. “They’re differentiating their bodies with who they are inside. They’re totally separating it.”

“They sell jeans with naked women in bus shelters,” says Myke. “You can’t ignore that. It’s hard to.”

These guys volunteer at an arcade drop-in, giving guidance to younger boys about respecting women.

“You’re waiting for the bus and there’s a big bum in your face,” adds Nima. “You’re just going to keep staring at it and miss the bus right? I’ve done that enough times.”

For Gordon, another volunteer at the drop-in, the majority of images he sees of women in the media aren’t helping young men to respect women:

“The magazine shows it in a sexualized way, that makes it hard for a man like me –or any man– to go out there in the world and see another woman, wearing that skirt, going to work, going to do her thing. It makes me look at her in the way I saw her in the magazine or on the TV.”

“I think that boys are losing more and more respect for women on a daily basis,” says Nima.

How deep is that?

These are older teens mentoring younger boys...real role-model types. Yet even they find it difficult to keep the sexed-up images they see in the media separate from their real-world views of women. If these near-adults are having issues, what the hell are little boys thinking when they see some chick gyrating in boy shorts, bouncing around in a bikini, or spinning herself silly on a pole while a group of fully-clothed men toss money at her?

Sure there are parents out there trying their damnedest to keep images like these away from their kids. But for every parent, struggling to raise a child with values and good sense, there are 20 other fools who could care less what their kid looks at.

Before we brush it off as "not my problem" don't forget, some of these media-soaked little ones will be sitting next to your good kid on the bus and in school. It can't just be a parental problem...the media's gotta take some of the heat as well.